f l o o d

A Complete Waste of Time

i'm not in a studying mood tonight, so i've been wasting time reading quotes at imdb, and i just can't stop laughing at this:

Peter Griffin : I'm looking for some toilet training books.
Salesman : We have the popular 'everybody poops', or the less popular 'nobody poops but you'.
Peter Griffin : Well, you see, we're catholic...
Salesman : Ah, then you'll want 'you're a naughty, naughty boy, and that's concentrated evil coming out the back of you'.

here are some other good ones:

[Riding a circus elephant]
Peter Griffin : Look Lois, the two symbols of the Republican Party: an elephant, and a fat white guy who is threatened by change.
_________________________

Peter Griffin : Brian, there's a message in my Alpha Bits. It says "OOOOOO".
Brian Griffin : Peter, those are Cheerios.
_________________________

Lois Griffin : What's going on?
Stewie Griffin : We're playing house.
Lois Griffin : The boy is all tied up.
Stewie Griffin : Roman Polanski's house.
_________________________

Peter Griffin : Now, I know you're a feminist, and I think that's adorable, but this is grown-up time and I'm the man.
_________________________

Napoleon Dynamite : Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills. You know, like nunchuck skills, bowhunting skills, computer hacking skills...
_________________________

Sam : Hey, I recognize you.
Andrew Largeman : Ooooo, from Columbia High?
Sam : No not from high school, from T.V. Didn't you play the retarded quarterback?
Andrew Largeman : Yea.
Sam : Are You really retarded?
Andrew Largeman : No
Sam : Oooo, great job man I really thought you were retarded. I mean, you're better than that Corky kid and he's actually retarded. If there was a retarded Oscar you would win, hands down, kick his ass!
_________________________

Andrew Largeman : You know that point in your life when you realize that the house that you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? All of the sudden even though you have some place where you can put your stuff that idea of home is gone.
Sam : I still feel at home in my house.
Andrew Largeman : You'll see when you move out it just sort of happens one day one day and it's just gone. And you can never get it back. It's like you get homesick for a place that doesn't exist. I mean it's like this right of passage, you know. You won't have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for you kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I miss the idea of it. Maybe that's all family really is. A group of people who miss the same imaginary place.
_________________________

Sam : I haven't even lied in like, the past two days.
Andrew Largeman : Is that true?
Sam : No.
_________________________

Andrew Largeman : Do you lie a lot?
Sam : What do you consider a lot?
Andrew Largeman : Enough for people to call you a liar.
Sam : People call me lots of things...
Andrew Largeman : Is one of them liar?

From My Covetous Mind

i want i want i want

my new dream guitar *drool*

and hey, there's one available on ebay if anyone's wondering what to get me for christmas.

Thoughts From the Shower Vol. 2

feelin' philosophical

in my critical thinking/writing class the other day we got into a discussion on pre-birth genetic enhancement for children. as you can expect, in a class with so many similar worldviews, most people spoke out against these practices. however, there was one girl who's logic seemed to be that even though it may br wrong now, as genetic enhancement becomes increasingly the norm, then we should use it. what i found interesting was a lack of the sense of just how different we as Christians are going to become in society as things progress. there will come a time, and it's not that far off, when we will be looked at as oddities for not enhancing our children, and our children will be considered disadvantaged. the way science is advancing, this is an issue our generation will have to face as we move in to starting families. they're is already technology being implemented by many to choose the gender and other physical traits (like hair color) of a fetus. it won't be long before things like intelligence, muscle mass, and height will be under our control.

the issue this brings up for me is that we as Christians are going to become increasingly separate from the mainstream, not only in regards to genetic engineering, but other areas as well. our society is steadily progressing towards a completely secular, naturalistic worldview. i find it odd that many Christians think that we are going to somehow be able to stem this tide and force our nation to retain it's Christian values through political means. personally, i think this degradation of society is going to be of great benefit for the Church. look at the 1st century church, their faith permeated every aspect of their beings because of how separate it made them. they were persecuted and outcast. this forced them to live lives of complete devotion. as the church became more mainstream and integrated itself into part of western culture, people lost this sense of alien identity that i think is so crucial to our Christian lives. but since the enlightenment period (which inspired the american and french revolutions), we've been inundated with ideas of individualism, naturalism, and nationalism which have overtaken our sense identity in God. since then popular society has grown increasingly secular, and Christians have become increasingly integrated into mainstream ways of thinking and living. i believe this is a wave we can not hold back. our goal now is to reach individual souls and as our moral and spiritual values pull us further apart from "the norm," we will find ourselves standing on a stronger foundation of faith.

...i had the rare luxury of a long shower, so there was much time to think.

Urgh

i (barely) survived the monday from hell. now i just need to survive it 15 more times and i'll be fine.

a prayer for the lost
a prayer for those who lost
a prayer for those who serve
a prayer for peace

in remembrance

Thoughts From the Shower Vol. 1

isn't it interesting how sometimes you get all these deep insightful thoughts while you're showering? well, at least i do. i'd figure i'd share some here.

i realized today that in my many years of college i haven't so much become more intelligent as i have learned to sound more intelligent. which i suppose makes sense because a large part of being an academic is speaking the language of academics. for example, in a conversation i might say something like "i don't know if he did such-and-such on purpose." but in a paper or in a discussion with a professor, i'd say, "i question the intentionality of his actions." so basically, i've spent several years and thousands of my parents' dollars to learn to use big words. great.

Big Brother is Watching You

something has dawned on me recently. well, maybe not recently as i've had these thoughts in the back of my mind all along, but i feel like talking about it now for some reason.

for the last 5 or 6 years, i've taken on the role of "gay guy friend" or "big brother" for most of my female friends, and i've been very happy with that. i've prided myself on being the guy that my friends can turn to without feeling threatened or having to worry about how i see them as a male. i like being the guy that doesn't only befriend a girl because he's attracted to her and who is there to listen and offer honest opinion. and this has worked out well for me as most of my closest relationships over the last several years have been with girls, and even at this point in my life i'd much rather have girl friends than a girlfriend.

while i can't say i have never been wistful about having someone there to care for and to care for me, i can honestly say i haven't felt a pressing, dire need to be in a relationship for a long time. however, i can't help but think that all this "gay guy friend/big brother" stuff is gonna come back and bite me in the butt. you all know my views on dating and you know i'm not the type to just go out there and jump into a relationship. i think for me, anyone i dated would have to be someone i really knew as a close friend beforehand. first off, i just don't have the social aptitude to go out there and hook up with someone i don't know, and secondly, that's just the way i work. i can find people attractive in terms of physical features or even personality, but i have to really know someone to even be comfortable with them as a friend, let alone see them as more than a friend. so, in light of all this i wonder, how will i ever shed the "gay friend/big brother" persona when the time come that i do want to move beyond friendship? have i already grown into this image so much that any girl i know would just think "oh i could never go out with ben, he's too much like a brother to me?"

just last night a friend i've made here at biola said that she already saw me as a big brother. now i really don't mind that because she's a sweet kid and her real big brother is all the way back in hawaii, and it would be a privilege to play that role in her life here, but it got me thinking. i willfully present myself as a non-threatening friend to girls. it has taken a great deal of effort to try to suppress any selfish desires i have and to try to view all the girls i meet as sisters, but i'm not a kid anymore. as my peers begin to settle into relationships, i can't help but wonder if it may be time for me to start opening up to the idea of possibly looking at a girl as more than a friend. now i don't want to start looking at every girl i know as a potential, and i would hate to turn into one of those guys that can't really be trusted as a friend, but is it time to start thinking about all that "how should i behave/talk/look/smell so that girls may find me attractive" stuff? i really don't want to do that. i have enough trouble being open and comfortable with people as it is.

it's funny, as i type all this out and think it over in my mind, it's dawned on me that i already know what i need to do. i know i'm not in a place in my life right now where a relationship would be beneficial. i need to be able to focus on God and on my responsibilities and i know that i still have many flaws that i need to work on before i can have a stable, Godly relationship. so until the time comes when God tells me i'm ready and puts someone in my life that i want to spend the rest of my life with i'm just gonna keep doing what i'm doing: being a brother. and i guess i knew that all along.

There's No F in Way

joy is making me post an entry because there was nothing here. but i don't know what to say. so....

LALALALALALALALALALALALALALAJOYISCOOL
LALALALABLAHBLAHMIKEISTOUCHINGMEIFEELVIOLATED
LALALALALALAhelppppppppppppppme...no more ben...... PUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA